The Hottest Wine in 5,000 BC

It wasn't pet-nat or Jura wines, but what were the cool kids drinking seven thousand years ago? Live Science, in the intriguingly titled "Origins of Inebriation Revealed", has the answer. If you were kicking it in 5,000 BC near the Zagros Mountains, located in Northwestern Iran, you were enjoying wine with pine resin added as a preservative. This is according to a study authored by a prehistory expert at Spain's University of Valladolid, Elisa Guerra-Doce. And since the written record doesn't reveal much from so far back in time, Guerra-Doce relied on "macrofossil remains of psychoactive plants, residues from fermented alcoholic drinks, psychoactive alkaloids (chemical compounds) on artifacts and skeletal remains, and artistic depictions of psychoactive plants and drinking scenes" to power her findings.

Unfortunately, wine-drinking back in the day (waaaay back in the day) was confined to wealthy folks. Until large-scale production made it possible, you probably weren't knocking back glasses of pine resin-redolent wine with your buddies after a day at whatever would be the equivalent of the office.